Fears

Let me lead you into a little adventure I had early this week...

Monday evening some of us went to the Field Director's house for dinner. Before dinner, someone decided to take a walk around the hills, enjoy some fresh air... The air was pretty cool after the rain. After some time we hit the top of the paved path, and FD asked if we would like to climb to the top to see some interesting plants.

Sure, no problem. We'll climb up for a bit, and come down to where we were. We got pretty high up, into one of the natural parks, chatting about how nice the area was. I suddenly felt something slimy on my feet.

"What's that?"

I looked at my right foot, and a black slimy thing was there... a leech! Disgusted, I flicked that thing away. G instantly inspected her feet and screamed.

"Get that leech off!"

FD calmly took the leech off G's foot and said, "Hey, see, they are friendly leeches. They don't suck your blood right away. You just roll it into a ball like that... and flick it away."

"No! They are not friendly! Get them off!" G insisted.

Well, I'm not very afraid of leeches, I have to say.. I don't mind pulling leeches and flicking them off.. AS LONG AS THEY DON'T SUCK ON MY BLOOD. Just as I thought that, my foot started to itch.

And then I saw this big, fat leech, sucking on my blood for dinner. I wasn't too sure what to do. I wanted to get it out, but I was afraid it will leave some vomit in me, which will be poisonous. FD pulled the fat leech off me, saying it wouldn't harm, and my foot started bleeding.

Great, I was in sandals. My feet were now bleeding and sticky... Whatever, we'll wash it off later.

We got to the top of the unpaved path, and the view was... amazing. I just regret not bringing my camera along. We saw Kathmandu city, clear after the rain. The stadium lights were on as there was a football (soccer) match that evening. The sun was setting, night was settling in. Everything was so calm.

"Come on, let's go down for dinner. It's late," urged FD.

"Oh no, I'm not very good at going down," G said.

"Be careful there. It's slippery," FD reminded.

I looked at them and saw the cliff we had to cross. It was so narrow, hardly two footsteps wide. And then I looked down. That deadly look. There was nothing below us except.. trees. I took a step forward. My legs started trembling. I didn't want to fall off. I couldn't go forward. I was stuck on the hill!

"Wait, guys!" I shouted. "I can't really move. My feet are trembling."

"I'll come by and give you a hand after G crosses," FD said. It took G a while - she was not very comfortable with narrow paths (well, cliffs) either. I was just holding on to a rock with my arms. My legs were both trembling beyond comprehension. And my feet. Were so sticky. From that leech bite. I didn't want to slip. To fall. I was nauseous.

"Come!" I looked up and there was FD, reaching a hand out to me. I gripped on it, pretty hardly, and slowly, moved my feet forward. I could not look down at all - the thought scared everything out of me. I could only look down at the earth. The unquestioning earth. And take one step at a time.

We crossed the cliff. There were stretches where I was not comfortable moving forward, but some I could. And I realized what made me so afraid: I don't want to fall off. I don't know if I'm afraid of death, maybe, maybe not, but I cannot bear falling off a... CLIFF.

After returning to FD's home, it was a relief. His five Tibetan Mastiffs came out and gave us a warm welcome. And oh, very warm. I used to be terrified of dogs. And Tibetan Mastiffs. They are big dogs. So here they are, surrounding me, sniffing me. I said "sit", and one of them sit, and stuck his paw out... and scratched my tummy.

Turned out he wanted to shake hands.. but I don't know how to handle dogs! So I just pet him, and slowly try to move away from the circle of Tibetan Mastiffs.

"Look, he's bigger than you! When he stands on his hindlegs he's much bigger than you," said G.

Those giant fluffy dogs!

We washed our leech-infested feet before dinner. Dinner was a great feast of dal-bhaat, achar, takhari, saap (spinach-like greens), and tomato curried chicken... yum! I ate quite a lot as that little adventure really worked me out.. Dessert was yummy yogurt, homegrown organic plums, and Sarlahi mangoes. We finished off with a huge mug of mint tea with honey and After Eight chocolate.

"Are your feet okay?" FD asked.

I looked down. Red feet... what? I put my feet in the air. BOTH of my feet were covered in blood.. almost completely. I was shocked - I did not feel anything at all. Fanatically, someone passed me some moist paper towels, and I started wiping the blood off... I couldn't figure out how many wounds I had - I was just really afraid to hurt myself without knowing pain.

My feet will continue to bleed until I went to bed.

I don't know what I would choose, among leech bites, heights, and massive dogs.

Thought of the day: what are you afraid of? What would you choose among those three?